Modesty Unveiled

I have been saddened by the many arguments about modesty and the reasons people give for not teaching modesty to their kids. Some say it oppresses them, others that modesty teaches their daughter that they are responsible for the sinful thoughts of others. They say modesty should be whatever you're comfortable wearing. That popularity and fashion are more important than modesty. Or that the female body is not evil and therefore we shouldn't treat it like it is by hiding it. I read one blog where a mother said she "taught her sons in such a way so that if a parade of naked women were to march past his face he wouldn't have sinful thoughts, therefore if the boys are taught properly then the girls don't need to oppress themselves with this outdated ideal."

In this self-centered society with an "I'll do what I want and who cares what you think about it" mentality, is it any wonder that we are more concerned about the "rights" of an individual than God's laws of morality?

I applaud this woman for teaching her sons to respect women, though I am reminded of the gun rights activist woman who similarly boasted that she had taught her kids to fear and never touch a gun, therefore guns should not be controlled, all we needed to do was educate our kids. But when her children were placed in a controlled setting where a gun happened to be present, and they saw that their mother wasn't there, they grabbed the gun and began playing with it.

You see, educating our boys is very important, but that needs to go hand in hand with teaching our daughters to respect themselves and dress modestly. In truth, boys have a hard enough time controlling their physical desires as it is, without their peers flaunting their god-given sexual appeal. 

But that isn't the biggest reason why we should dress and teach our children to dress modestly. Our number one reason should be:

1. To Honor God
1. This should be our number one reason to keep all commandments. Jesus said the greatest commandment is to Love God (Matt. 22:36-38). And that if we Love Him, we will keep His commandments (John 14:15). John even taught that when we love God, then the commandments are not grevious or oppressive (1 John 5:3).
2. We better recognize how modesty glorifies God when we understand what modesty really is. "True to the Faith" explains: “Modesty is an attitude of humility and decency in dress, grooming, language, and behavior. If you are modest, you do not draw undue attention to yourself. Instead, you seek to ‘glorify God in your body, and in your spirit’ (1 Corinthians 6:20). The Lord has always set the example of glorifying the Father. During His mortal ministry, the Savior never drew attention to Himself but rather pointed His followers to the Father, teaching, “He that believeth on me, believeth not on me, but on him that sent me” (John 12:44). In attitude, appearance, word, and deed, the Savior taught us about the importance of modesty. (See Apr. 2014 Ensign, If Your Eye Be Single to My Glory) This is what He meant when He said we should "Let our light so shine before men that they may see our good works and Glorify God" (Matt. 5:16).
3. Part of honoring God is expressing gratitude for the gifts he gives. Your body is an incredibly wonderful gift from God, one that we should respect and protect.
   
2. To Respect myself
1. When we dress modestly we send a message to others that we respect ourselves. That we are children of God and have worth in who we are, not just in the attention we can get from the skin we show. The way we dress affects how we view and treat ourselves. To put it more bluntly, the way you dress and act represent what you think about yourself. And that in turn sends a message to others about what part of you that you deem is most important. If you respect yourself, you view yourself as a child of god, not a spawn of the flesh, and you reflect that knowledge in your dress, grooming and behavior.
3. To Respect Others
1. The Lord taught that the second greatest commandment is to love others (Matt. 22:39). When we love others, we seek to lift up, inspire and ease their burdens (see Mosiah 18:8-9). The Lord's golden rule is to treat others how you want to be treated (Matt. 7:12). Yet in today's self-centered society of "I'll do what I want and who cares what you think about it" mentality, many believe they should not be responsible for the way we affect others with our manner of speech or dress. And before we argue about whether our appearace affects others and whether we should be concerned about that, let me say inoquivicolly that: 
1. It is true that a man is responsible for his own thoughts and actions. It is also true that a women’s body is sacred, special, and in no way wicked or evil. It is absolutely false, however, that exposing your body to a man or woman in a non-marital setting isn’t an offense to that individual. Men and Women are divinely endowed with powerful physical reactions to each other that are difficult to control. It’s instinct and it’s nature and it is there for a beautiful purpose. If you present that temptation, man or woman, to the opposite sex outside of the appropriate bounds, mark my words, you will be held responsible for it before God. You are not responsible for how they choose to react to it, but you are definitely responsible for imposing it upon them.
2. If you were on a diet, you wouldn't want your friends to flaunt donuts and ice cream in your face, right? The same is true for modesty, though to a much higher degree. When we love others as ourselves we don't desire to make it more difficult for them to have pure and chaste minds while around us. On the contrary, we desire to help them reach their full spiritual potential and not be a stumbling block for them.
4. To Protect myself
1. Protection from heartbreak. When we dress immodestly we make it difficult for others to see past our appearance to the person we are inside. Therefore, friendship and/or romance is based on appearance instead of being grounded on truth. It has been said that if a girl dresses immodestly, then some boys will place her on a pedastool, if for no other reason than to look up her skirt. You want to attract someone who will like you for who you are, not the peeks they steal when around you. That only leads to heartbreak.
2. Protection from abuse. It is true that the way you dress sends a signal to those around you about how they should treat you. If you dress like a cop, you'll be treated like one. The same for a businessperson, a baker, a goodie-goodie, a nerd, a skater or a druggie. And if you dress like an exotic dancer, you will be gawked at and people will expect things from you. This isn't to say that abuse doesn't happen to modestly dressed women, unfortunately it does. But why give others the idea that they can expect you to be loose or a slut. Though you will get attention, and it will seem exciting, this path only ends in sadness.
3. Bottom line: The way we dress signals to others how they should treat us. Save yourself the heartache of being treated poorly and with disrespect.

If you are unsure about whether your dress or grooming is modest, ask yourself, “Would I feel comfortable with my appearance if I were in the Lord’s presence?” You might ask yourself a similar question about your language and behavior: “Would I say these words or participate in these activities if the Lord were present?”

Remember the law of the harvest: whatever you plant in life, will then be your harvest. The Lord taught, “For intelligence cleaveth unto intelligence; wisdom receiveth wisdom; truth embraceth truth; virtue loveth virtue; light cleaveth unto light” (D&C 88:40). In other words, if you want to attract someone who has wisdom, truth, virtue and light, then you have to be those things first. Alma understood this principle when he taught: "that which ye do send out shall return unto you again" (Alma 41:15).

The truth is, the way you dress and present yourself tells others how to treat you, AND it represents what you think of yourself. But most importantly, it reflects upon your conviction to honor The Lord.